If you are in at immediate risk or danger, dial 000

What to Consider Before You Leave a Violent Situation

If you are thinking of leaving an abusive relationship it is really important to plan ahead. This can make leaving easier and safer. The most important consideration is the safety of you and your children, you may also have concerns about your pets. 

Often a person who uses violence and abuse may become more controlling, abusive and dangerous if they believe you are planning to leave. The thought of you leaving may threaten their sense of power and control.

In an emergency you may not have time to grab belongings and documents that you would like to.

If it is possible to plan ahead, you may like to keep your most important documents such as: photos, passports, healthcare card, children's birth certificates etc in a safe and easily accessible place. You may consider keeping photocopies of these in a safe place outside your family home.

Please read our technology safety planning information before you leave, so no-one can track you through your phone or email etc.

Safety Planning

A safety plan encompasses all your needs to keep you safe. Your safety plan will include your safe escape plan.

Who can help me make a safe plan?

If you make a decision to leave an abusive relationship, we encourage you to contact Safe Steps Crisis Line on 1800 015 188. The women at Safe Steps will support and assist you to make a safety plan. 

Things you will need to think about for your safety plan:

  • Will you leave by foot, car or do you have a friend you can call?

  • Where will you go to, eg. family, friends, motel, neighbour, police, refuge?

  • You may want an overnight bag . Could you leave this with a friend?

  • Make sure your mobile phone is charged and has credit.

  • You can call the police on 000. Even if you don't speak they will treat this as an emergency call from a landline telephone.

  • Let a trusted friend, family member or work colleague know what you are planning. You may like to nominate a safe word let them to know you are in danger.

  • If you have access to money you may think about giving some to a trusted person to keep for you, in case you need it.

  • If you open a new bank account, ensure the bank statements are not sent to your home address, or email address that others have access to.

  • Where will you go to in an emergency. Police station, motel, friend's house?


Important items you may need:

  • money and or bank cards, credit cards

  • keys to the house, car or work

  • extra clothing

  • medication

  • school records and immunisation records

  • driver's license

  • medicare & healthcare cards

  • birth certificates, Passports or immigration papers or visas

  • person items: jewellery, photos etc